I’m so exhausted.. Partly my fault cause I stayed up late watching Mijonju talk and rant about cameras… But he just makes the morning even more of a drag then it usually is for me… I have that uncomfortable lump in my stomach.. You know the feeling when you want to puke but can’t?? Yeah.. That’s how I feel right about now..

Even smacking duck butt’s butt doesn’t put me at ease anymore.. It like lasted 5 seconds before I had to pull myself together and smile for the customers.. I’ve been making so many mistakes today too… I just wanna run somewhere and hide. == damn the weekdays… Seriously…

I’m not even hungry and I’m forced to go on break.. And I can’t even act cute with the fucking guy cause he’s just…. HIM! == I am so annoyed… FUCK…. FUCK! FUCK!

Recently… I just started working at Starbucks as a part timer.. Yesterday was my very first day and everything was fine… Until I woke up this morning with a cramp in pretty much every joint in my body… ==

The experience was worth it though… Learnt a lot of staff… Met new people… Gained a new appreciation for the working class… Being a barista is not what I thought it would be… I hope I can do my best..

Apart from the job, I have another job as well… My job as a student… == I don’t know whether my decision to start working would be the end of me.. I have a bunch of assignments to complete and not enough time to do it.. :/ I have completed one.. Somewhat.. But there are another 5 waiting in line… All require a large amount of my time… I don’t want to stop working cause I dont want to seem indecisive and I don’t want people to think that I easily give up…

So when I get back, I always do my best and start doing my assignments but I always end up distracted by Star Trek… Yes… I’m watching Star Trek… So sue me :p Its a nice show… :3

Honestly… If it were up to me… Id just quit school and start working… :3 but of course its not up to me.. == dammit

I’m currently in the middle of design media class using the macs to edit a video… == I hate this kind of work… The actors sucked and the story is boring… :/ and the scenes are inconsistent.. They need to get a new actress… Lol

I wanna go back to my childhood and watch myself.. I’d probably be a lot like him… As drooly and as wide-eyed.. :3

:3 lol a direct translation of one of my fave Japanese songs… It’s by the Radwimps… Somehow listening to it over and over again just makes me wanna find someone and tell them I love them… Haha!

I’m sure I’d either be slapped or sent to a mental institution… XD

Inspiration: RADWIMPS – Iin desu ka?

There is this one guy in my program that look like 2PM’s Jang Wooyoung… XDDDD I want to paste his and Wooyoung’s picture side by side here, but I’m afraid that’s a little bit too stalkery… :p even for me…

His name is Melvin Shawn… :3 although he has thicker lips than Wooyoung, they both have matching droopy eyes and an innocent look… XD

I honestly don’t feel safe in this hostel anymore…

Is it possible to feel seismic shockwaves all the way here from Indonesia? O.o the last time it happened, people said they could feel their houses swaying lightly here as well…

But that was only one time when the earthquake was really strong… == shit this is scaring me…

Shit… They look so cute next to each other… And the guy who looked like the uke has log eyelashes! Wtf! XDDDDD -squeals inwardly- damn they would make a good story… -snickers to self-

This is not going to be a post about Marxist theories or Marxist ideologies. This post is just a rant. As many of my other posts have been. :3

[Picture taken from marxists.org]

Today… The social stratifications discussed by Karl Marx have been bouncing around in my head. Mostly because I have to read about his views on social stratification. Darned assignments are making my head spin. I have an assignment due next Friday and a presentation due on the same day.. Another assignment, or rather a test, is due on Wednesday the following week and another assignment is due the week after that. =.= Please make it stop…

My hectic timetable and lack of free time is starting to show… I seriously can’t find time to have fun and most of the time I feel like I need to read the handouts or printouts, because otherwise, I’ll start feeling guilty…

WHO THE HECK FEELS GUILTY FOR NOT READING HOMEWORK?!

Apparently me.

I have to look for an article about Wikileaks and analyze it for discourses, hegemony and shit as well… GOD HELP ME NOW! If only I believe that there is a God… Cause if there is I’m sure he’s rolling around on the floor somewhere up in the cosmos while all of us are suffering down here….

At least I’m not alone in this struggle… I have people suffering beside me. After all, misery does love company. Whoever thought of that should get a nobel prize… Isn’t that a form of rhetorics? Because that quote has become a norm, people are convinced that it is true therefore it is. Am I making sense?

Never mind.

Rambling anyway.

It’s been so long since I last updated. I miss the easy to navigate interface of wordpress… Blogger should have shit like this…. Did you know that I have to create a blog and write about blogging… How fun… Now if only it were true (the fun part not the assignment).

I think it’s clear from my post what kind of state of mind I am in… O.O

An unstable one.

Next ramble please!

Honestly I think I’ve aged like 10 years…. == even the way I write and talk lacks that ‘young’ and ‘innocent’ feel that it did before…

What the hell has the world done to the easygoing me? It probably slaughtered it in my sleep, when I was least expecting… :/ anywho…. Shit has happened… And I don’t mean it in a bad sense… What I mean when I say ‘shit’ has happened is just to show that diddly squat has happened… Nothing relatively significant has taken place… I am me and the the world is the same as it has always been; constantly changing and leaving me behind…

Damn I feel so emo…